Skip to content

Curmudgeon And Hurt Feelings

2015 December 9

Well golly, who is to say how much time passes until a worthy rant (in my curmudgeonly opinion) piques the fancy? Well Breitbart managed just that:

Judith Shulevitz, writing in the New York Times, reports that infantilized college students are indulging their need for insulation by demanding “safe spaces” where any speech that could hurt their feelings would be forbidden.

But if “safe spaces” means nothing that hurts feelings is ever said I’m curious how anyone will ever know what you say will or won’t “hurt feelings.” What color is the sky in that world? Shucks, my feelings are hurt that students attending any institution of higher learning have such narrow insight they don’t understand what must occur so no one could cause hurt feelings.

There is but one way to prevent hurt feelings (AKA “offensive speech”). Gain acceptance into a monastery that requires solemn vows of silence, become monks and rigidly adhere to those vows. In other words the entire population of our planet no longer talks. When words aren’t spoken no “hurt feelings” could happen. Right? Well, I guess it’s a start. Except when I go past one of these safe spaces and extend a middle finger toward whoever occupies that “safe space” can you imagine someone getting “hurt feelings?” Me too. Guess there’s work to do.

Wait! Someone (or many someones) may send texts that hurt feelings. Dang! Texting has to go. Cellphone pictures and videos will hurt (AKA offend) feelings. Though I won’t lament the end of “selfies”, ain’t it obvious feelings will be hurt? With all the problems associated with communicating we gotta end the cell phone industry.

Never mind capitalism, corporate greed or how severely Mizzou students feelings may be hurt. But imagine how hurt their feelings will be when they have amazingly expensive Smart Phones that became totally Stupid Phones because they never considered the consequences of demanding their feelings never be hurt. Imagine their demands were met and caused the end of the cellphone industry.

Oops! Almost missed the less obvious things that would need to go so no one could have their feelings hurt. Pens, pencils, paper, computers, printers, world wide web and any other form of communication possibly resulting in hurt feelings.

And it goes even deeper. Government hurts my feelings multiple times per day. Just a wild guess but I suspect I am not a minority. The way I see it if no one else is allowed to hurt my feelings, government isn’t allowed to either ‘cuz I’m one of the owners of our government. So here’s the challenge to Mizzou students: organize and accomplish the means of preventing government from hurting feelings and I will enthusiastically join your movement.

You want safe spaces? Keep in mind life is unsafe. Danger is a constant and there is no power on earth or anywhere else can assure safety.

To the best of my knowledge there is one exception but consider I dropped out of University education after only one year. My father claimed most academic types are “educated damned fools” and by the end of my Freshman year it was hard to disagree. Back to the one exception: when you’re in the grave nothing threatens your safety. You want absolute safety? That’s how to get it. In my opinion choosing that solutions classifies you in the “Lunatic Fringe” category.

Many thanks to Tom Cochrane and Red Rider for recording “Lunatic Fringe.”

Whoa! A good rant is so much fun.